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Quick Update . . . Again


Hey gang. You may be wondering how things have been going as of late. Well, I'll tell you. Stressful. Thats how. Writing songs is hard. Especially when it feels like you have nothing left of any worth to say. I have a habit of falling into esotertic rambling lyrics that make sense to me and my mood but appear as complete gibberish to any sane person. This is not good. But fear not, things are coming together. Take my word for it when I tell you that this album is going to rock your face off. Yep. Ok, I gotta go write lyrics. Wish me luck kids . . .

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Greetings!


Hello all. I just thought I'd give you a quick little update. I haven't gotten up the desire to rewrite the lost blog posting but thats ok. I'll fill you in on what's currently going on . . . Chris arrived on Friday night and we had ourselves a nice long, stressful weekend but its ok because things are going incredibly well. The songs are really, really coming together better than I could have ever expected. This cd is going rock your face off. It really is. Oh, and Chris and I totally came up with a gnarly intro for the cd. I don't want to spill the beans and ruin it for you but just take my word that its gonna be epic. You're gonna love it. Totally and completely. Love it. Ok kids, thats about it for now. We don't have any for sure song titles yet but once we do I'll fill you in them. Here's some working titles though just to whet your appetite . . . Beneath Onyx Skies, Summer Is Gone, Hollow Bells (Forsaken), The Dirty Song, The Pop-Punk Song, Without You Here, What Dreams May Come, We're All Insane, and The Metal Song (aka: m/). There's more songs than that but they don't even have working titles that would make sense and I'm bored and can't think of them at the moment anyway. Talk to ya again soon my dears!

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Poo


I hate you Sean. I totally just wrote this beyond awesome blog and when I went to post it I had to sign in again and now its gone. Way to go. Your system sucks. I hate you.

Ok, ok, I don't hate you. I'll just have to write it again next time I feel motivated . . .

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Long Time No Speak


Hello my loves! My my my, it has been a mighty long time since I have graced this blog with my wonderous words. Silliness. Its what I excell at. Well, that and various forms of laziness and procrastination but shhhh don't tell anyone that ;) So, you may be wondering what has happened to me in these past couple months. Well guess what? You're about to find out! Somethings at least. Not all. I do reserve the rights to hold my secrets close to my heart if I so desire so deal with it!

Ah, so where to begin . . . Let's start with tour. We toured. All over the southern part of the United States. It was a pretty good tour for the most part. Clearly there were several ups and downs along the way but it all turned out for the best I would say. We got to play SXSW for the first time and I must say that was a pretty interesting experience. Walking around the streets at night though was pretty rocktastic though. So several bands that I had wanted to see (Spitalfield and Bayside) and missed many many more. But its ok. Speaking of Bayside, they were my cd of the tour. You see, every tour has a cd that ends up being my soundtrack for the tour. Last summer it was Moneen's The Red Tree. Last fall it was Senses Fail's Still Searching. And this past tour was Bayside's Walking Wounded. Its odd how it happens. It just fits perfectly for the way the tour is going and how I feel and all those sorts of things.

Naturally there were a few good shows on this tour but nothing quite as stand out as in the past. All in all, I think I could describe this tour as rather uneventful. Not bad, not great. In the middle. Which isn't too bad of a place to be really.

And now on to more recent matters. As you may or may not have heard, we are currently hard at work writing songs in preparation for recording in a month. Yes, thats right, after FOUR!! long years of waiting, the time is almost here. For those of you that caught us on the last tour, well, ya know those new songs we played? Yeah, after careful consideration and advice from producer extraordinaire Will Salazer we have come to realize that those songs are rather bellow par. So on one hand, if you liked those three songs (Reaching For The Sky, All This Time, and August In New York) I'm sorry to say that they will very likely not make the cut. On the other hand though you can rest assured that the ten or songs that make the cut will blow those songs away! And I've gotta be honest with you kids, umm, yeah, our sound has changed. A lot. I know this might upset some of you but well, it is what it is. Something About The Stars was written when I was 17/18 and I'm now 22. A lot has happened in the past four years and I've changed a lot as both a person and a musician. You may be wondering what they new sound is . . . Well, its hard to describe really. Grown up I guess. Don't worry, we're not a screamo band and we're certainly not a radio rock band. I guess you can best imagine our sound by looking at a song like January Embers and imagining what that would sound like evolved four years later. Take it from me, its lovely. There's still gonna be uptempo rock songs but the vast majority of that punk influence so readily at the surface on SATS (and especially Kids These Days) is pretty much gone. I'm not even gonna try to find something to compare our new songs to. Its good though. You'll love it. The cd is gonna be out September 4th so mark your calendars and start saving up your milk money (cause who needs milk anyway?)

We're gonna do our best to start updating this much more often so bookmark it and check back often!

*Hearts*

Edit: I have been informed that my description of our upcoming cd is not nearly exciting enough. That it supposedly makes it sound boring. Well, trust me on this, it is going to be far from boring. Is "grown up" a bad way to describe something? I certainly don't think so. I have grown as a person and a musician and the music reflects this. I'm not a kid in a garage writing three chord punk songs anymore. If thats what you like then there's certainly nothing wrong with that. Hell, Green Day makes a pretty damn good living off doing just that but that kind of music is no longer what drives me. So no, the songs will not be boring. They will be complex and interesting. There will be songs softer than anything you've heard from us before and songs heavier than anything you've heard from us before. Imagine the difference between Your Favorite Weapon and Deja Entendu. So please believe when I tell you that you need to be excited about this album. I'm excited for it. I believe in it. These are the songs I hear in my head at night. These are the songs that keep my from sleep because I just have to get the idea out. These are the songs that burn inside me. So there.

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Patrick's Top 15 Albums of 2006!


15. Protest The Hero - Kezia
14. Quietdrive - When All That's Left Is You
13. Underoath - Define The Great Line
12. Saves The Day - Sound The Alarm
11. My Chemical Romance - The Black Parade
10. 30 Seconds To Mars - A Beautiful Lie
09. Dashboard Confessional - Dusk and Summer
08. Matchbook Romance - Voices
07. Spitalfield - Better Than Knowing Where You Are
06. Brand New - The Devil and God are Raging Inside Me
05. AFI - Decemberunderground
04. Thursday - A City By The Light Divided
03. New Found Glory - Coming Home
02. Senses Fail - Still Searching
01. Moneen - The Red Tree

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Decemberunderground


Hello children. Hey Chef. How are you today? Bad. Why bad. Because the vistors kidnapped Kyle's little brother.

What did that have to do with anything? Nothing at all of course. I just felt like saying. And don't call me dumb! You're the one that sat there and read it . . . I just typed it. Well anyway, we've been home for almost a month now. It seems like its been ages already though. The tour has become another memory. Its scary how fast that can happen. Its funny though, I still occasionaly find myself getting freaked out because I don't have the van keys with me. Which of course doesn't matter at home but does on the road. Its weird. Sometimes I find myself snuggling up with my iPod at night instead of listening to it on from my speakers because thats how I would do it on tour. I spent every night of the tour with the hood of my sweatshirt up and my iPod going. I can't sleep without music unless I'm really tired. Its funny the way things like that carry over. It was weird being back in the van on Friday to drive up to Long Beach and to sit in my seat and not have all my crap around me. It just didn't seem right. It seemed so empty and lifeless.

Speaking of the show in Long Beach it felt amazing to be back on stage again. I must admit though that I'm a little bit out of show shape. I was out of breath by the end of the second song. It was worth it though to feel that rush again. There's nothing in the world quite like it. Big thanks to everyone's favorite merch girl for making the trip with us to give us a hand with the selling of the merchandise. (Because as everyone knows, I make a horrible merch girl . . . ) We're still trying to get her to drop out of college and tour with us forever but we'll see.

So, as you may or may not know, Pensive will be spending the majority of our winter writing and hopefully recording new songs. So far, its going amazingly well. I have a feeling you'll all be pleasantly surprised with the results. But, those of you looking for Something About The Stars part two will be let down. Those songs were written many, many years ago and we're completely different people. While there may still be a few hints of such music, expect some changes, both subtle and huge. And no, there will be no screaming.

Come see us on Friday in San Marcos!

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Eventually We All Are Going Home . . .


[From this point forward, I will be posting all blogs both here and on my personal Myspace Page]

I'm home. It doesn't even seem possible. This is been quite possible the strangest two and a half months of my life. Already it seems like little more than a dream and I haven't even been home a full day. There have been many many high points and many many low points for me on this tour. We've had some of the best shows we've ever had and some of the worst ever. There were moments, standing on stage, guitar in hand, where I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that this was exactly what I wanted and that there could be nothing more amazing in this world. There were moments, standing on stage, guitar in hand, where I didn't think I could possible go on another day. When we had random guest vocalists for "Walking on Glass" in St. Paul MN and Jackson MS, everyone rocking out together, it was some of the most I've ever had on stage. Or when we were playing to empty rooms, or worse, crowds that didn't even pay attention, I felt like sure a failure. I remember sitting on top of our trailor in Chapel Hill NC, strumming my guitar, trying desperately to find the strength inside me to play the show that night instead of just walking down the street and disappearing. At that point, we'd had a string of pretty horrible shows. Morale in the band was at an all time low. Certain people that I had come to rely on for support were nowhere to be found. I felt completely alone. Desolate. Self-esteem could not have been lower. Any of these on their own could have been easily dealt with but piled upon eachother it was nearly too much to handle. However, I found solace in what else but music, specifically The Artist In The Ambulance by Thrice. It made me realize that no matter how down I may be feeling I owe it to myself and everyone there to give 110% with my every breath. Not something that is easy to stick to but its goal. Now this is hardly to say that tour was all downs because it certainly wasn't. Playing at The Attic in Plainfield IN was quite possibly the highlight of my musical career (even beating out playing in front of 700+ kids when we opened for Fall Out Boy . . . ) I don't think I've ever seen a crowd more into our music and singing along so loud we could hear them over our amps! (and in case you didn't know my philosophy on amps and such is that if your ears aren't bleeding after our show our amps aren't loud enough . . . ) That show was truly amazing. Even our last show of the tour in Phoenix (a city not well known for Pensive love [excluding certain long time fans of course :D]) was a suprising success. The room had been slowly but surely getting emptier and emptier as each band played. I was dreading playing to an empty room for our last show. And then on the first note of the first song my amp/cable/something died and I had no sound! After messing with it with half the first song I finally got something and by then I was just not having a good time. However, the crowd was so into that it even lifted me out of my despair. Despite the relative smallness of the crowd they gave it their whole heart and I could nothing but return the favor. They even crowd surfed!! Yeah, ok maybe it was more like four guys holding another guy over their heads but whatever. Amazing.

In what I'm coming to expect in my life now, I've yet again had a series of people coming in and out and in and out of my life. A friend that I once wished the absolutely worst upon is now a friend yet again. One very close friend nearly disapeared on me and that really, really sucked the life out of me but all has been resolved so have no fear. Others seem to fade in and out. Alas. I met several really awesome people on this tour. Some really cool fellow musicians and photographers. Plus I met what is without a doubt the coolest cat ever to exist!

Now that I'm home though I don't know what to feel. As always seems to be the case I find myself at a cross-roads in many a sense. And right now I'm too exhausted to even think about anything. My emotions are so close to over flowing that its hard to surpress tears. Tears of happiness? Sadness? Relief? Something else? I don't even know. All I know is that I need sleep . . .

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Stranger than Fiction...


I had the strangest Pensive-related dream last night (and no, it wasn't one of THOSE dreams) So I thought I'd share.

The boys and I were at SOMA to see Cute is What We Aim For. Sean was filling in for them on bass (nothing out of the ordinary here...) Their set starts, and I'm singing along to their first song, when I realize I don't KNOW any of their songs. They're playing a Pensive song: "Yesterday Fades Away".
It turns out that Sean got confused and started playing Pensive tunes instead of CIWWAF, and the 'Cute' boys just went along with it. Julio, having never heard of this band, was pissed. "Those !$@#&%s are stealing our songs."

In my dream, SOMA had a swimming pool in the back, and several flamboyant carribean costumes were floating in the murky water. Pat dashes onto the patio and cries, "Lauren, grab those costumes. We can wear them onstage!" Some of the heavier components of the aforementioned flamboyant leisure wear had sunken to the bottom of the pool. Pat demanded that I swim down and get them. "But I can't. I don't have my glasses. I can't see what you're talking about!"

Just then, a Jamaican guy walks up to us and says "HEY! Those are 20 bucks each." So Pat replies "I'll give you $22.50, not a penny more." Offended, the Jamaican guy says "No deal." and walks away, leaving me holding armfuls of colorful clothing. This is when I woke up laughing hysterically.

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awesome bands


yea so we just played a show with some awesome bands tonight. handcrafted, pistolita, and my american heart. they melted my face off with theire facemelting rock. plus they were all sweethearts.
you missed a great show lauren.

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Do You Want To Play A Game?


I know I sure do. And what game would that be? Well come on now! If you know me at all (and well know anything about video games) that answer should be beyond obvious. Do you give up? The answer: Final Fantasy XII!!! Getting that game is number one on my list of things to do when I get home. Its a good thing I've got the hook up at Gamestop. Harry and I both got the collector's edition waitin' for us :D I'm basically just going to lock myself in my room and do nothing but play FFXII . . . I've heard that is awesome. Do I think it will be better than FFVII? No. Sorry but I don't think it can surpass it. Why? Because I'm sentimental. So take that!

So anyway, as some of you might have picked up, the title of this long delayed blog posting is a reference to something. A movie. Or actually a series of movies. Saw. Yeah Saw. We made Julio watch Saw I and II back when we were in Nashville last week. He handled them pretty well for someone that claims to hate scary movies. Not that Saw is really that scary. Disturbing would be the better word I believe. So anyway, yesterday was All Hallow's Eve (meaning today is All Hallow's naturally) so to celebrate our favorite holiday we went to see Halloween (a special re-release of the original) and then we snuck into Saw III. Thats right, snuck into it. We hung out in the bathroom for a while till it was time to go into Saw. Yeah thats right. Well for only part of the time actually. We snuck into Flags of our Fathers for the previews since we got bored in the bathroom. Bathrooms aren't really all that entertaining. So how was Saw III? Disturbing as f*** . . . Its like the previous two put together . . . mulitplied by 10^4. Ok, maybe not quite that much but its gross. I'll spare you all the details since I don't think it would be appropriate. But I will ruin the ending for you by saying I think there's going to be another one. Craig doesn't but I do.

Its been a while since I last posted anything so I thought I should let you all know that you don't need to worry anymore since I picked up the Jurassic Park trilogy at Best Buy for $20. I haven't gotten a chance to watch it yet since the tv in the van is broken and for some reason DVDs are really choppy on my computer. But I will watch it soon. I would watch it right now but apparently no one else wants to watch it. Losers.

So the tour is winding down now. We've got just over a week to go now. Its kind of crazy actually. Touring is very surreal. Its basically a whole life unto itself. Life outside of tour doesn't exist. The Patrick that works at Gamestop and spends his free time drinking Jamba Juice while reading at the Barnes & Noble in Santee is a completely different Patrick than the one that is writing this. Its funny. The difference between on stage and off stage Patrick used to be much greater though I've been told by numerous people that know me that I've changed a lot in the past year or so and have become much more out going and sociably. I guess. I dunno.

I want to watch Freddy vs Jason. I need to buy that one too . . .

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